FIND YOUR SYNERGIES
‘Femi Adekunle on Parenting
As someone said, conflict is inevitable in life, but combat is a choice. It’s same in the home. Where conflict ensues, they are meant to be resolved rather than resorting to hostilities.
I am not an avid TV person. Besides listening to news and watching documentaries, and sometimes sports, I hardly sit in front of the TV. Years ago when my kids were still very young, there was a time when I was always in conflict with my kids because the few times I had to watch my own thing, they would always compete, rather, contend with me. I therefore decided to pay for dual view on cable TV.
I discovered that in solving one problem, I created another. In view of the fact that our TV interests hardly harmonised, they were always in another room watching their own favourite programmes. This gradually started driving us apart and the quality of the family time we used to have together started diminishing. I quickly shut down the dual view and we were forced to watch the same programme per time. Sometimes, they are forced to watch my own while I try to make them pick interest, or I force myself to watch theirs with them, even if it’s as boring as it could get.
The domestic ecosystem is an arena of conflicting interests. To achieve an equilibrium, you must strike a synergy of divergent interests in the home. The interests of the husband and wife will not only clash, that of the parents and their children will also clash from time to time. This may bring a strain on the family, bring conflicts and keep the family from having fun to the maximum. In the example I gave above, I was able to achieve two things: resolve conflict, as well as improve quality family time. Don’t forget that more often, LOVE, to the children is spelt T.I.M.E.; in other words, the quality of time you spend with them impacts them much more than anything else.
The domestic ecosystem is an arena of conflicting interests. To achieve an equilibrium, you must strike a synergy of divergent interests in the home.
‘Femi Adekunle, a Parenting and Family Coach, writes from Abuja, Nigeria.
Email: femi383@gmail.com
WhatsApp: 08055103512
20th February, 2026
